Stains and Scratches

The stains and scratches cannot hide the beauty of my green mug. It was a find in a second hand store. The colour, the image of a leaf sketched on each side caught my eye. The warm hot chocolate, tea and coffee I have enjoyed using it. 

Insignificant mugs, how many we throw out because it has a chip or we just want a change? That is what the person before me might of thought. Just a month or so ago, I noticed a hairline crack on the inside and outside of the mug. No, I thought. Why when I get something I really like, does it break or get lost. Why? So I keep enjoying my tea out on my patio, enjoying the way it sits in my hand. The handle hugs my hand as I take a sip. 

I wonder when will it break or should I throw it out. If I just use it once in a while it may be okay. Then I think what if it one day breaks and I am scalded by the hot tea. Should I keep it?

Many times in life we hold on to things that were never ours, we hold on as long as we can to a relationship, not wanting it to break or change. 

Even though it may have been something we cherish and love, it just is a matter of time before it is going to crash, and we may be burned. Why do we hold on? We know it is going to hurt, we know we can’t keep it? We may think we can fix it or take care of it and it will be okay.

For now I keep it, handle it with care. Will I be prepared for the pain, the loss? I look through my closet, my dining room hutch. I have held onto things that were other peoples’ things’; my aunts, my mothers, why? Why is it so hard to let go? My daughter has said “I don’t want that”. So I keep holding on I think they are beautiful and want to give it to someone who will enjoy it. Sometimes I give it to a niece or a friend who has commented that they like it. 

Letting go is part of life, I am learning. Enjoyed relationships and things, I must appreciate the time I have had with them. Love ones we have lost, will lose.  

The tears are already in my heart. I cry already for the pain I know I will have when they are gone. 

Thank you Lord for them in my life, they have been a part of me, given me joy and peace. I will let go of the things that have caused pain and hold onto the memories of love. 

Throwing out all of my mismatched mugs and buying a set of new ones. Enjoying the ones friends have given me.

The stains and scratches I have inside, have made me stronger and smarter about the choices I make. 

I will find another mug. The kaleidoscope of my life  beautifully changing, moment by moment. I may not see it or feel at times that things are changing but the crystals are moving around and round and the new designs of my life is being created  again today and another tomorrow.  Journey of my life is continually being redesigned.